Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I'm In a Funk...

I. Feel. Weird... not like sick weird, but just weird. Like something within me is off. These past few days I have felt very negative and depressed over things. I feel off. My mind is a jumbled hot mess of nonsense and I just feel - heavy. Not weight wise (though I do wish I were skinnier) I just feel like this weight of stuff is on my shoulders. I have a lot in my head to get out...mind if I just allow my head to dump for a moment?

Aunt Sharon's funeral was lovely. It was a long 6 hours there - but I got there and found out that Aunt Sharon talked about me all the time. Here's the thing, we've met once - at my wedding. She barely knew me and I always assumed that she just considered me her nephew's wife - but apparently she talked about me a lot and very highly. When I met her daughter (she's in her mid 40's I believe) she said, "So you're the Denise that my mom always talked about." Really, I mean, she talked about me that much? It really touched me and I ended up crying a lot. The drive home was horrible, we got stuck in traffic in Louisville for like EVER! And Parker was not happy, but we made it.

Since Friday night - things have been just a blur. My cat left for her new home on Sunday morning with my in-laws - perhaps that has me in a funk. I really miss her presence in the house, even if she was annoying at times. I miss her meowing when I walk in the house and when she wants food and really anytime. I miss her cuddling with me. I miss her kneading my chest. It's sorta lonely here with out her.

And I am just tired, I feel so out of it from that too.

I don't know...maybe I just really need vacation next week.

On a more positive note, Parker is catching up very well in his development. He had an appointment today and the PT said he was doing really really good. She isn't as concerned with him now like she was last time we had our evaluation. We have some things to work on but nothing we can't deal with.

That's all I have to say about that!

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