I'm No Michelle Kwan...

Oh, the dreams I had growing up. Especially during the winter olympics...I was all about it. And all I wanted to watch was figure skating. Especially the women's.

I was all about Nancy Kerrigan, Kristy Yamiguchi, Michelle Kwan....so on, so on...

And after I watched them perform, the next morning...I'd be out in our backyard on the ice rink that was created in a large whole we had.

Now on the ice - Denise Deerwester of the USA. She's performing to "The Song in my Head." Oh yah and I'd start...and I'd do my triple axels and loops (other wise known as me jumping just a bit off the ice straight up...it's all I could do.) And my camel spins...or not so much. I'd end and break down in tears at how wonderful I had just done. I could faintly hear that chanting of USA, USA - in my head atleast) and I would go to my spot to get my scores... All perfect tens thankyouverymuch.

I had a dream....no it never came true, but I'd still like to think that I could go out there and get a perfect score and kick some booty on the ice.

Except that I hate the cold weather now...and I have no desire to really be out. Though I do miss ice skating!

You don't want to know what I did during the summer Olympics and my "gymnastics." Seriously...I think you'd have night mares!


You're turn, head over to Mama Kat's site and write from the list of 5 prompts.
1.) The heart that just wouldn’t quit.
2.) Relay an entertaining conversation or string of emails you recently had with someone.
3.) Open your picture folders…find a random “February” picture from a past year and tell a story.
4.) Childhood memory time: Write about something you loved to do as a child.
5.) “The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned” ~ Maya Angelou -Now write.

Writer's Workshop: A Letter...

A Letter:

Dearest Apartment Neighbors,

I would like to kindly remind you that you live in an APARTMENT community, therefore you will have to share a wall, parking, and other things with others. Since you are sharing, I'd like to remind you to do it respectfully and kindly.

To the neighbor who finds it necessary to slam your door EVERY TIME you enter and exit your home - please stop. I get that sometimes the wind will catch it and blow, but not every day! Did you ever think that maybe it causes things to fall of walls? Or, perhaps that your neighbor might have a headache and not want to deal with your slamming of the door? Do you not understand the word considerate?

To that same neighbor who seems to think she owns the first two closest spots, um, you don't. Now if there was say, assigned parking, then yes, you would have the right to park there, but I don't find it the least bit fair that you leave a car you never drive parked in the closest spot and when you do decide to move it, that you then proceed to park your other car there as well. It's not that I want the spot, it's just rather petty and annoying that you find it necessary to act as if you own the dang spot. Again - CONSIDERATE?

Oh and to you neighbor that has fights at 3 am out in the parking lot..get some counseling or something, yeesh. It's really annoying. Also, the language...really, do you realize that you live in a complex that has a lot of little kids? I certainly don't need my child hearing that language you use. Even if it is 3 am.

I just don't understand why when you are living in an apartment community you don't understand that you should be considerate and respect your other fellow apartment dwellers. It would be nice to not have to write this letter again!

Your Neighbor,
Denise




Today's prompts:

1.) Describe something someone has done to make you feel special.

2.)Name your current addiction...we can get through this together.

3.) What have you been busy doing that's keeping you from updating your blog? How hard is it for you to get back into the swing of blogging when you take time off?

4.) Write a letter.

5.) Where would you like to be?

Head over to mamakats site and take your turn!

10 Things I Hate about you I am sick of.

In an effort to make my brain stop suffering, I give you 10 things I am sick of (in no particular order - or well, maybe an order).

1) Jon and Kate + 8 Affair/Money Grubbing/Open Marriage Controversy...



Here's my thoughts, whether it happened or not - I don't know, we may never know the full truth, but at some point you have to look at yourself and look at how you are acting and responding to said controversy and step back and start focusing on healing things and how important the kids are. No - I am not a fan of divorce and I think that most problems can be solved if you and your significant other are willing and wanting to solve them. Personally, I do believe there was an affair - however, I don't believe that Kate would offer Jon an open marriage out. I do feel like they are mostly in it for the money now. I just feel like the years show how things have changed...and that is sad. They need to stop their show and focus on their marriage, family, children - there are 8 kids that will be affected by this.

2) Tabloid/Paparazzi



And this is why things like the J&K controversy become more than they should. Really - get a better a job, do you have nothing better to do then stalk on celebs and write junk about them. Do you feel good about yourself when you do? It's really sad how far things can go when it comes to the stalkerazzi and tabloids. I feel like those in this field lack some form of human emotion. Even I, a simple stay at home wife and mom who is not a celeb find it sad the extremes that these "professionals" go to. :(

3) Terrible Drivers/Road Rage/Driving Ignorance



Case in point: Yesterday Drew and I are headed home. We decide to cut through a little side street in a strip mall. There are OBVIOUS signs for those not coming of the main road that say "In coming traffic does not stop." We get through the light and proceed. Car one stops a full car length in a half PAST the stop sign. We honk, as we have the right away and rather than at that point just going, he stops in the middle of the road. Literally, right after this guy goes another car, who has witnessed the whole thing does the same thing. And has the audacity to FLIP US OFF....um hello genius...we are not at fault - you are! Seriously, it makes me not want to drive, the lack of courtesy, lack of following the road rules and general "duh" things that come along with driving. Like duh - big red octagon shape with STOP written on it is probably a sign that means STOP. Or DUH, turn signals when attempting to switch lanes and someone is behind you - a good thought. Flipping us off for following traffic rules - ugh. Really...get a life!

4) My Husband's Car



Sorry hunny, but I am so over the every other week break downs. Ok, so maybe it hasn't been every other week - but oh my word it feels like it. And what makes it worse, we have put a lot into to get all these things fixed and it CONTINUES to do the exact shame thing...stall and break down. Then when a mechanic get is "nothing shows up" or we get something fixed, it's fine for a couple of days and then doing the same thing. I am so ready to take the stupid thing and just let someone hit it so we can just get a new car. And when we get a new one - we won't make the mistake of getting one that does not have a warranty and i will be a part of the decision more than I was.

5) Shows I like being cancelled/ending



Stop the madness and just bring back Eli Stone, Pushing Dasies and ER and no one will get hurt. I also am not happy that Samantha Who has been cancelled and The Class- I loved that show.

6) The JumpArounds



Could they be any more annoying? Oh man, and cheesy, so cheesy. Ugh...

7) Being Told My Son is Tiny

Ok, I get it some - he's a little guy and almost walking...but after hearing so much over vacation, I just can't deal with it anymore. I feel like putting a sign on his head that says, "Yes, I am a preemie and tiny...move along." I don't know what else to do. It normally requires an explanation of why and even that gets annoying. But see the thing is...he isn't tiny...tiny is his 2lb 3oz body that could be in both my hands and that's it. Tiny is a 1 pound miracle from God. Sure he's small, but when you see someone really heavy you don't go, "oh my gosh, so big." Or at least you shouldn't.

8) My Son teething/moving/hitting his head

I was not at all prepared for this part of being a mom - toddler stage. I realize it's all part of growing up, but after about bump 5, I am just done with it. Sigh, yet, I love it, I love that he is so interactive and silly and tries new things. I just wish I had some bubble wrap sometimes.

9) Being Over Weight

I have terrible self image and I am trying to lose some weight...but it's hard and i get frustrated with myself. Help! I can't help my coke addiction - kidding!

10) My Apartment

Ok so not the apartment it's self, but the general cluttered and unorganized-ness, non matching picture frames, white walls, our tropical bathroom set (why did I register for that?!), not having patio furniture, needing to plant flower, ect. I just want it to feel more like home and less like an apartment, ya know?



And Now It is your turn:

pick from the following prompts:

The Prompts:

1.) Share a love letter.

2.) Memorial Day Weekend plans?? Do share!

3.) List ten things you are currently sick of.

4.) Put an outfit together using pictures you found online and show us what you'd LIKE to be wearing today.

5.) What have you been too busy to pay attention to.

Write your entry and then head back to Mama Kat's site and leave a mr. linky there so others can read your Writer's Workshop Entry!

Plastic Surgery For Me?!

Before I go any further, I would like to note that this entry is about plastic surgery thoughts and female stuff. So if you are of the male persuasion, I suggest that you stop reading here....lest you be red in the face. Also, another friendly warning, this is a hard subject for me to share, but I am doing it for support and prayers.
/
/
/
/
/
/
/
/
/

2.) Is plastic surgery an option? Without being vulgar, write about the body part still attached to you that you would most like to dis-attach and replace with a better one.
(writingfix.com)



Ok, are all the men gone? Good! I want to share my thoughts on plastic surgery with all of you. alrighty, here goes:

I am going to be flat out honest here - I HATE MY CHEST. HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT. I do my best to enjoy what God has felt the need to endow me with, but quite honestly, the enjoyment almost always is non-existent. It's really hard to describe to you the pain I feel due to the largeness of my chest. I am not the skinniest person, I have a little extra weight on my body, but by no means do my "girls" match the size of my body. They are much larger than someone my age, height, and weight should be carrying around. They have always been larger than I feel they should be and I am horribly embarrassed by them a lot of the times. I really struggle with self image anyways and then add in there the large chest, it makes it hard for me to enjoy things completely.

When it comes to plastic surgery, I really don't like it when one does it to just do it. I will never understand why people go in to get a larger chest (maybe that's because of the size of mine) or a facelift or other types of implants. I think for medical purposes (i.e. breast reduction, help after an accident, ect.) it is ok. I myself have always considered breast reduction. My back is in constant pain and my chest just makes it hurt. I wanted to wait, though, until I had children because I had planned on breast feeding. Now though, with the struggle I had with even producing milk and not knowing if I want any more biological children, I am seriously considering having a reduction done. I really feel that if I did, I would be able to enjoy Parker more, life more, myself more.

I am prayerfully considering pursuing this within the next 6 - 12 months. I want to make sure that if I do decide to pursue a reduction, I am doing it for the right reasons. I want to be at total peace about it and as it stands, right now, I am not, I think mainly because I don't have all the details about it and I am scared of having surgery. I keep thinking about what happened with Parker and having to be on a vent and the pain and such and I think those thoughts and fears are really putting a damper on my desire to have a surgery that I believe would help with my quality of life. I also want to make sure that insurance would cover it, that I research this desire enough that I don't get into any trouble.

This would be a huge step for me if I was able to follow through with it, but I don't want to rush into anything. As far as I am concerned, plastic surgery for medical purposes is an option for me, but for recreation purposes, not so much. I have no issues with my face, or the rest of my body (though I would love to lose weight.)


Your turn! Head over to MamaKat's site for all the prompts for her writer's workshop this week. Pick your poison, write up a blog entry and then go back to her site and leave your name and that post under Mr. Linky!

Writer's Workshop: What was that? An Ode to Girl Scouts

Prompt 2:
I really like the band Fall Out Boy, but I am not going to lie, most of the time, I have NO clue what they are saying. They sing too fast and the words all get scrambled together and then I basically just make up words in my head that sound remotely close to what they are saying. Most of their songs come across a big mumbled mess. And really, most of the time, their titles for the songs don't make sense either. Yet, I still love them. I realize I could look up the lyrics, but what fun would that be, to know the lyrics, when it is much more fun to make up my own! I mean, the words may be Dance, Dance, I'm falling a part to half time, but isn't it more funny when I sing, "Dance, dance, I'm falling apart at bedtime?!" much more fun.

Prompt 3:
I will never forget my girl scout years.
The good, the bad, the ugly, the weird.
Those badges and the tasks.
The friendships that would last.

I will never forget selling cookies.
Thin mints were popular.
But me, I liked Carmel Delights.
I always wanted to win, but didn't.

I will never forget camping.
The boys scouts with the water balloons.
The raccoon's outside the tent.
The walks in the woods in which we were sent.

I will never forget Kylie*
She complained the entire walk.
And by the end the day
she had peed her pants.

I will never forget our leaders.
They always made things fun.
I learned a lot when we'd hang out.
They knew how to let us be girls.

I will never forget the glamour shots.
That was one of my favorite activities.
I also loved when we made food
oh the fun times we had.


Your turn, head over to MamaKat's site to read the rules and to post your link!



The Prompts:

1.) Book review!

2.) When is it okay not to listen to the words? Explain about a song you really love that has lame lyrcis or lyrics you simply don't understand.
(writingfix.com

3.) Why won't you forget? List six true sentences that begin with the words 'I'll never forget...' Then use all six of your sentences in a paragraph, poem, or longer descriptive piece.
(writingfix.com)

4.) Write about an interaction you had with a salesman.

5.) What's for dinner? I'm starving.

Why do I watch this? Stupid Fascination!

I have to get this off my chest friends...it's something I have been holding in for a while now and I don't think I can hold it in much longer. I have this weird fascination with something so shameful, I just don't know what to do.

I am fascinated with toddler beauty pageants! There, I said it, are you happy now?

A few weeks ago I was really bored and decided to watch this show called, "Little Miss Perfect."and then I came across this show "Toddler and Tiaras" They are about the world of toddler pageants and I have always thought that young ones dressed in gobs of makeup, stiff hair and flippers was so wrong. Sadly, after watching just one show....I am fascinated with the world of toddler pageants.

I should state, I have NO DESIRE to put Parker in them, though, with his looks how could he not win? Nor do I have a desire to have a daughter and enter her into them. I still think they are so wrong and messed up, but interesting. Some of these little girls are so into doing it, it's sad that this is their life, others act like they are proud of their accomplishments but act like they hate all that you have to do. And the mothers (and a few fathers here and there) are NUTS. The mom's get so intense and bitter and mean and it's just...fascinating.

Oh and the flippers...the fake teeth they get for girls who have lost theirs. Those just make the girls look much more fake. And the do fake tans and all.

It's actually really sad to me that parents put their kids through this. I have nothing against beauty pageants, but I don't think little girls should be dressed up like this.

And yet, I am fascinated. Not sure why, I just am.


Your turn, head over to Mama Kat's site and put your link in Mr. Linky.


The Prompts:

1.) I used to think...

2.) List ten things you can do in three minutes.

3.) Describe a time you allowed your child to do something that you normally would not let slide.

4.) I want to become friends with...

5.) What are you currently fascinated with?

Why Did I Do This?

She was my best friend, we knew each other well and had many inside secrets and I hurt her and while she may have forgiven me, I have yet to forgive myself.

To protect the identity of my friend and people in this story...all names have been changed!

Shelly came into my life in middle school. She was new to the area, having been fostered by a family at church, trying to help her because her life back at home with her real family was just terrible. We hit it off right away, she may have been a year younger than me, but I knew I could trust her. We always seemed to get in to trouble at youth group events. We always had to be in the same room. I trusted her with my life...

...but I hurt her. Towards the end of my jr. year of high school, her sophomore year she started dating Pete. With Pete came the realization that I was no longer as important or at least I felt that way. She spent most of her time with him, did everything with him, I felt completely pushed away, like she didn't need me anymore. I don't remember what I said or did exactly, but I know that I got angry enough to say something that I would later regret. Maybe it wasn't anger so much as it was jealousy, I wanted my friend back, the one that did everything with me, but she was too busy with Pete. Whatever the exact words, they hurt her, and thus ended this friendship.

The last bit of my jr. year was a very awkward time. We didn't talk, we didn't wouldn't look at each other at church or school. I had hurt her and had attempted to apologize, but she was hurt too badly. The summer between my jr. and sr. year we ended up both going with out church to church camp as counselors. We were pretty much forced to talk, but it was only about camp, we never hung out otherwise, we got along to get along and that was it. I was sad because I couldn't enjoy camp with my best friend and felt awkward. But this time sparked something in both of us.

Senior year and I was getting excited to graduate. Shelly and I still didn't talk much, but we at least acknowledged each other. We shared some of the same friends so we had to. We could talk, some, but it was never like it had been...it was never us being bff's, sharing our inside jokes, laughing hysterically. We did out best to talk some, we would talk at church some too, she even attempted to encourage me when my parents got divorced that year. Somewhere inside both of us I believe that forgiveness had happened...or sparked at least. I got busy with applying to college and working so we rarely saw each other, but when we did, we talked, some. I graduated and on a whim invited her to my party, she came, with a gift and card (that today is in a picture frame). On that card she wrote, "love you." Those words mean everything to me, especially today. That summer once again, we were at church camp together. That is when things changed, we were able to joke again and laugh again and be close again, it was the best summer ever.

I went off to college but tried my best to keep contact with her. I did the best I could, but knew it would be hard. I went home for Labor Day and got to see her again. It was great, almost like old times. We were both busy, but got to hang out at church. I hugged her and headed back to school. She contacted me on my birthday, a few days later, it was a great surprise. School got busy and I didn't get the chance to reply back to her...Oct. 5 I went home for homecoming, tried to see Shelly, but didn't have the time. I got back to school on Oct. 6 2001. I had been back maybe an hour, when my "mama" figure Nancy called my room. She has been my children minister at church, I lived with her when my parents first split, and she had been working at the college I ended up going to for a couple of years. Anyway, she called my room telling me that we needed to talk. I said ok and that I would meet her in the lobby. I headed downstairs, somewhere inside me, I knew something was terribly wrong, terribly wrong. She sat me down and well, I think I died a little that day...

Shelly had been in a car accident, she died instantly, never felt any pain, she was in the arms of our Father. To say I was devastated was an understatement. I felt like something inside my died...I was sick to my stomach (even now as I type this, I feel sick). My best friend was gone and I never got the chance to tell her how much she meant to me and I had to live with what I had done to her that hurt her. I went home for the funeral and was able to get to her viewing early and got some along time with her. I walked in holding her foster sister's and foster mom's hands. There she lay, so beautiful, so perfect, so peaceful...I lost it. Her foster mom took me aside and told me that Shelly had forgiven me and that I needed to forgive myself. She told me, that we all make mistakes, say things we wish we hadn't and that Shelly knew that I had been hurt by her relationship with Pete and that she had forgiven me and talked about me often and missed me.

I am going to tell you right now - I don't know how to forgive myself. I want to, I do and I know Shelly would want me too, but I just can't. I feel like I let her down, I feel like I never got to tell her how much I loved her and felt terrible for what I did. I hurt so bad; so bad. I have her picture by my bed, I was even able to go over to her house a few days after her funeral and help her parents clean out her room. I kept a few things, they told me to take what I wanted, I kept her sweatshirt that she always wore - it smelled like her (still does). I also kept a couple of pictures.

If ever I miss her, I grab her sweatshirt and put it on. It's a little small on me, but I don't care. She feels close that way. I wrote her a letter and left it at her grave about a year later. In it was everything I had wanted to say, but never got the chance too. I am sad that Shelly wasn't there for my marriage and to meet Parker, but I know that she is in my heart. I am would like to one day forgive myself, but I know there is a long road a head. I love Shelly, I miss her and I hope that as she looks down on me, she knows and can feel that I miss her.

I love you "Shelly", so very much!



Now it's your turn, head over to Mama Kat's site and check out the prompts, then write your entry and leave a link on Mr. Linky!

The Prompts:

1.) Discuss an intense game of Pictionary that you spent most of Saturday night arguing with your family about, only to log in to your email account two days later to find 35 emails between said family regarding aformentioned game and rules.

2.) Tell about a time you hurt somebody that still bothers you to this day.

3.) The one that got away....spill it.

4.) What inspired you? Write about a time when you were impassioned to write.

5.) What happened in the last year? Write about something you can do now that you couldn't do a year ago.

6.) Write about the event that was the end of your childhood

Normal Is...

**Edit Update** Please pray for my friend's from church. They found out at their 20-week ultrasound (in Nov.) that their baby, Abigail, would not live. She has triploidy and stopped growing around 16 weeks. Little Abigail went to be with Jesus on Monday and tonight at 7 they are being induced. Please pray as Abigail is delivered that that will go smooth and that they will be at peace. I can't imagine the pain they are going through.

What is normal? Well here is my normal...

Normal Is -
- Hearing my son talk in the morning when he is awake, knowing I have yet another day with him.
- Changing way too many poo diapers!
- Baby spit up all over me
- Wearing jammies or sweats most days
- Baby slobber on my phone
- Stepping on toys
- Screeching
- Lugging a lot of stuff every where I go
- Attempting to relax during critter's nap time
- Not enough time in the day
- Seeing Drew only occasionaly during the day - yay for full time work
- Twittering a lot!
- my blog
- Focused on my son more than myself
- daily mommy guilt
- easy meals (love frozen things)
- loving my friends and my network
- coos from the bedroom
- praying critter naps

Yup thats my normal!

And now it is your turn! Head over to Mama Kat's Site for more about Writer's Workshop. Below are the prompts!


1.) Write a limerick.

2.) Normal is...

3.) Describe a memorable camping experience.

4.) What's the best thing that has happened this week?

5.) Did you have a childhood hideout? Where? Describe it.

6.) Words that hurt me.

Writer's Workshop: And Ode to Parker

An ode to my baby boy - Parker!!!


About nine months go you came,
Bursting into my world.
Cute as a button small as could be,
Dear son of mine, how I adore thee.

Emergency c-section brought you into my life.
Frightening was the choice to make, but
God gave me the strength to choose,
Having you, that was worth it.

I can’t believe how well you’ve done.
Jumping hurdle after hurdle
Keeping steady all along.
Learning and growing just like you should.
My strong boy, you’re doing so well.

Never doubt yourself and strength
Ordinary, you are not.
Parker, my life, my love, my light
Quitting is not an option.

Rough was your start, hard it might have been.
Son, you’ve done so well, can’t you tell,
That I am proud of all you do.
Unbelievable, baby, that’s what you are.

Very loved and very blessed.
What a miracle you are to me.
XOXOXO
Your Mommy Loves you
Zero, no, you are a ten!

- Sorry if this poem is kind of lame or strange, I have never claimed to be a poet - add in that each line had be the next letter in the alphabet, and well, you get this! I think it's good considering my lack of poet-ness!


Now it's your turn, choose a prompt below, post it on your blog and then head over to Mama Kat's site and post your name and post in Mr. Linky!

The Prompts:

1.) For your birthday a sibling has decided to have the first six months of your blog printed and bound. Write a forward for the book.

2.) Write a 26-line poem using all the letters of the alphabet, where the first line starts with the letter "A," the second "B," the third "C," etc., culminating with the final line starting with "Z."
(writersdigest.com)

3.) Start your story with, "In retrospect, I wouldn't say it was my best idea." And end it with, "And that's how I attempted to make this world a better place.
(writersdigest.com)

4.) What would the truth have done? Write about a time when honesty was NOT the best policy.
(writingfix.com)

5.) What made your childhood bearable? Write about it.

Writer's Workshop: Behind the Blog

Here I am in all my non hair brushed, non hair washed, non bathed, non made up with make up and in my jammies glories. This is me every morning. I don't really have a daily beauty routine. I am anti-makeup. I hate the stuff, I only wear it on special occasions...like a wedding. Make up takes too much time and to be honest it's been YEARS since I have worn it regularly. I just simply do not like it. Make up = blechy.

As far as my hair, I am hating it right now so I basically keep it in a pony tail, pulled back. I wash it every other day (If I am lucky) and I sometimes just don't want to brush it because it's thick, curly and annoying. I am really wanting to chop it off. I wear it curly about 95% of the time...I hate taking the time to straighten it, though I prefer it that way. But again, it plays back into the being thick and curly...straightening it with it like that is a nightmare and after doing like 5 minutes of it, I am sick of it. If I do straighten it, it takes me at least an hour...if not more. I am planning on getting it all chopped off and wearing it short, hopefully in a bob, if that works ok with my hair type. I would straighten it more and do more with it if I had less of it on my head. (That's another post of another day!).

As far as bathing...yah, I am lucky if I get to bathe. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I am gross and smell....I just don't bathe often and when I do - its like 5 minutes while Parker lays in the bedroom and plays. If I never had to bathe, I would be fine with that. I hate the whole process of it. I hate shaving - I. HATE. SHAVING. I hate being in my birthday suit. I am a very modest person and even though it's just bathing and that's why I am naked, I still hate it. I hate being wet, I hate being wet and cold, I hate that most towels don't fit all the way around me. Meh, it all is just, meh. I do attempt to bathe every other day, even if for just 5 minutes, sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't.

I basically am always in pjs or sweats most days. I have a child with bad reflux, so about 9 times out of 10 I am wearing most of what he's eaten. (He has this impeccable timing of puking when mommy picks him up when he cries!) So that's why I am almost always in pjs or sweats, that and they are super comfy. When I go out, I at least try to throw on jeans, but I also mostly wear tshirts or sweatshirts out.

So what do you think of me now???? I have an "ugly" side - or well a normal side. This is what I look like when I sit here and write my posts. No glamour, no hotness, just me, in all my comfy, non bathed, non hair brushed/washed, jammie wearing glory!!!!


Your Turn:

Choose a prompt, write your little blurb and go back to MamaKat's site and share with the rest of us on Mr. Linky:

The Prompts:

1.) If you were starring on American Idol TONIGHT and HAD to sing, what song would you choose and why.

2.) Take a picture of yourself right this minute without primping and explain to us why it is you have not washed your hair today.
3.) I just asked Pat to help me with a writing prompt so here's his: "What do you think about the NBA All Star game"...blech.

4.) What's your number one pet peeve? Develop a punishment for anyone caught in the act.

5.) Write about something mean you did to a sibling growing up.


And in case you didn't get to, please read my post from yesterday, its something VERY near and dear to my heart and I would love your help!!!

Writer's Workshop: Current Loves...

You know the old song right: "Rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens. Brown paper packages tied up with string, these are a few of my favorite things..."? Well if you don't then you are missing out on a great movie (I digress). Below, is a list of my current 5 favorite things...enjoy!

1) The Tibetan Mastiff


So the other night while Prez. O was talking, I decided to find something else to watch and ended up watching the Westminster Dog Show. I love watching dog shows and I love seeing all the dogs (even though sometimes I find them very weird looking!) I love dogs! Well, this kind of dog was on and I simply fell in love with the beautiful big puppy called the Tibetan Mastiff. Personally, I like big dogs but when I think big, I think Golden Retriever - but when I say the mastiff on the dog show, it was at that moment I decided I will own one someday.

2) Coke Zero


Technically I have liked this drink for a long time. But it's only been recently that I have deemed it my favorite soda - winning out over Dr. Pepper and regular Cherry Coke. I am obsessed with this drink...I. Love. It.

3) Shout


How can I NOT love this stuff? With an 8 month old that always gets more on him then in him, I enjoy spraying Shout on all of his garments. Sadly we have some permeant stains on some of his bibs (this is before I discovered the amazing power of Shout!) but that's ok...at least his clothes aren't stained!

4) Confessions of a Teen Idol


This show is on VH1 and it brings together former Teen Idols in an effort to reintroduce them to the world of being an A lister. It's really interesting seeing this idols realize the different world there is as a celebrity. To be honest, I don't really recognized an of them, except for the one from Grease 2. But I like seeing them learn that things are different and be honest with their struggles. It's slightly addicting at times!

5) Baby Lap Time at the Library


So almost 2 weeks ago I took Parker to lap time at the library. I fell in love with it. I would have taken him Monday again, but we had our great car issue of 09 (lets hope it remains the only car issue!) and then Parker got sick :( But I have been trying to do some of the stuff at home with what I have. Parker seems to do well with it. I love it! I am hoping to start the habit of taking him every monday (or as much as I can). He enjoys it and I want him to get in to reading and love it. Unlike his mommy who sadly, only just took to reading recently (and when I do read, I am picky!). I actually want him to read like his daddy (who I tell daily that if he reads anymore his head will explode!)

So there you have it my current 5 favorite things (in no particular order). I could have gone on to name a couple more things, but I stuck with these 5.

So now it's your turn...

Directions:
For you newbies it's never to late to jump in!! Here is what you must do. Choose a prompt that inspires you most. Write. Come back Thursday and paste your blog URL into the Mister Linky that will be up...this way anyone can click on your name and head over to your place to see what you wrote.

Feel free to write on more than one prompt if you so desire. I do it all the time, but it's my game...and I don't know how to shut-up...so it should be expected. And remember the more comment love you give, the more comment love you get so comment comment away.

The Prompts:

1.) What was the first CD (or record or cassette) you ever purchased? Write about the way that particular album made you feel then. Write about how it makes you feel now.
writersdigest.com

2.) You were recently laid off. Instead of moping around, you've viewed it as a chance to start fresh. Pick a new career and write about your first day on the job.
writersdigest.com
3.) List your five most recent favorite things.

4.) I'm hungry. Share your very favorite recipe!!

Head over to Mama Kat's site after you have chosen your prompt and post your post to Mr. Linky!

Writer's Workshop: Losing my mind!

Top Ten Things Swirling in my Head:

1) Where is my W2? I called my former boss in January to make sure she had my new addressed. She faxed payroll and yet no W2...now I get to wait for payroll to call...this stinks.

2) Why are people so mean? I am the follower of an amazing blog that for whatever reason is coming under scrutiny by people. Questioning this family's motives and being REALLY rude in the process.

3) When is this dang cold, snow and ice going to go away? I am SICK of it.

4) When will Parker finally sit up on his own, without some support? He does well for 10 seconds and then falls.

5) When can I get more money to go out and buy a couple of things at the flower factory? I want to get a new thing to hang on our front door...a welcome sign, but I need money first.

6) Weird dreams - I keep having very weird dreams. Tuesday night I had one where I was dating Michael Phelps and attempting to help him break his pot habit...he went psycho and tried to kidnap me while my friends (the seeds) took Parker. And then last night, I had one where I was in cambodia and wanted to go see the orphanage, but I was there for a safari and then some army guy tried to shoot me, but shot himself. It was really weird. I think I need some mental help or something.

7) Mommy Guilt - I am enjoying my book (not the side of my blog!) and I am learning a lot as I do read this book. Yet, I still feel guilty!

8) Toddler Room Stuff - I am developing structure and curriculum for the toddler room at church (and LOVING it) but am struggling with the lesson telling. I was planning to just do it the way I had seen at a Ministry conference workshop, but the more I think about it, the less I like that idea and want to do a puppet. Like a bear - Bobby Bear from the Vista Mountains. Have him help tell each weeks lesson, I think the kids would get a kick out of it and want to listen more. I just have to figure it out and see what my hire-ups think ( ore or less, do they think it would work!) I really like the idea!

9) Pregnancy - I want more kids, I do, but I am terrified of having the same issues I did the last time. At this point, I have zero desire to be pregnant again, but I keep thinking what if I get pregnant even though I am doing everything not to get pregnant. How would I handle that. I seriously don't think I would be happy about it at first. But then again, I shouldn't worry about it at all. Me and my worrying.

10) Valentines Day - Where should Drew and I eat? What should I get him? Why do we celebrate this holiday anyway? And for that matter, why do we celebrate Groundhog's Day? It's not like they have super powers or anything. And when is it Christmas again?

Your Turn, below are the prompts, choose one, or two, or all, writer up your post and head over to Mama Kat's Blog and leave your name under Mr. Linky!

The Prompts:

1.) Tell us about a lie you told that you later regretted.

2.) Choose a task you'd like someone to complete and write a poem asking them to do it.
3.) Describe a talent you have.

4.) Write a list of ten things on your mind this week.


:)

Writer's Workshop: Espanol = Amor

(But before I begin...my baby is 8 months old today - wow!)

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Espanol was never my favorite subject
I took it because of you.

Sugar is sweet
Lemons are sour
I have to admit
Your class was my favorite hour.

Winter is cold
summer is hot
Teacher you should know
you probably shouldn't have smoked that pot.

Hearts, they beat
Fingers, they type
I loved going to Mexico
it was so worth the hype.

Thank you for teaching me
thank you for listening
thank you for being
my favorite teacher.

Ok, how lame was that poem? I should note that I chose not to actually say the teacher's name. This teacher got in some serious trouble after I graduated high school and no longer teaches. There were accusations of the teacher using drugs, drinking, and other things. But I enjoyed taking espanol because of how this teacher taught it to me. Though I don't remember much. No me gusta el gato is about the only spanish I know...and if you know what that means, you get 500 bonus points! Oh and also, I was able to go with a big group from my school to Mexico. We went in saw all kinds of ruins and such and ended out our time in Cancun, this teacher was a chaperone there.



Your turn: Check out the prompts below and decide what you want to write about, then head over to MamaKat's site and leave your information in Mr. Linky! :)

The Prompts:

1.) Tell us about a stray animal you took in.

2.) Write a poem for your favorite teacher of all time.

3.) Describe someone in your life you wish you saw more of.

4.) Write a letter to someone who bothered you this week.

Hard Times Lead to Joy!

Imagine if you will, you are pregnant with your first child and you are so excited. You have it all planned out...you know how you are going to organize everything, where everything goes, how their room will be decorated (once you are out of this tiny little one bedroom you are in!) and how you plan to bring them home...oh the utter joy and excitement.

BUT THEN

You're thrown a curve ball. You begin to get ill, very ill and you are in pain, a lot of pain. Before you know it, you are about to make the hardest/easiest decision you have EVER made. Your life will never be the same. Your child is born 11 weeks early, he is a tiny little guy, only 2 lbs. And you, you are in ICU, tube down your throat, horribly ill and completely unaware of what the next 2.5 months of your life will be like.

This was my reality this past summer. It was the quite honestly the hardest time in my life this far. I figured, if I could get through my parent's divorce, the death of a mentor, the death of my best friend...surely I could get through anything. But for the first time in my life I honestly did not think I could make it through this. How on earth would I ever get through the fact my son, my first born, was born 11 weeks early and so so tiny. Add in the fact that I had him Thursday and didn't get to see him until Sunday because of how ill I was.

This is what I saw on the first day I saw him:

He was the smallest thing I have ever seen, so fragile, so tiny, so perfect. How on earth was I this fortunate? But how on earth would I survive the next xxx amount of days he would be living in the NICU?


My life had turned upside down. I was not only ill and recovering from an emergency c-section as well as help syndrome. I was now thrown into this universe that is so completely different then anything you could imagine. I don't even know how to totally describe life in a NICU...it's surreal and scary all at the same time. Every little hurdle jump leads to another hurdle, a bigger hurdle and just when you think things are looking up, just like the snap of a finger, it can change. I became a hermit...daily spending at least 6 hours beside my son's bed, learning the tricks and trades of dealing with a tiny little baby. I became a wealth of knowledge on medical terms I never would have known. I learned how to change out heart monitors and helping to put Parker's CPAP back on and how to sponge bathe this little thing. All the while, attempting to hold it together and hiding in our little corner, curtains drawn, snuggled in a chair.



The estimate they gave on the length of our stay was basically that this little guy would be in the NICU at least until his due date...I couldn't even imagine that. My summer became all about Parker. Wake up, eat breakfast, pack my bag, head to hospital, park, walk to elevator, down the hall, sign in, wash hands, turn corner, eye Parker's spot (B4, then C4, then A13) grab nurse, update, find chair, pull curtain, curl up in chair and just stare. 6ish hours later...home, dinner, tv, sleep...repeat. That was basically my summer. Occasionally I would attempt to do something like shop or get coffee (well in my case, tea or chai) but every time I did that, I felt guilty that I was enjoying myself while my son laid in the hospital.

May became June became July....that's when we had our first "date" of bringing Parker home. However, things changed, eating became a challenge, poor baby had terrible acid reflux. Eating was a challenge, feeding was harder because it just hurts to watch your child struggle. But soon....we found things that helped...Zantac...and a wedge. Within a week of being on the wedge, the 3rd best day of my life came.



AUGUST 5, 2008
-the 3rd best day of my life....(next to Aug. 6, 2005 - my wedding day and May, 29th 2008 - the birth of Parker)

I woke up a hot mess. I was thrilled, excited, scared, nervous, sad, happy. I took the fastest shower of my life (I have since learned, you can shower faster). This was it, the day we were waiting for for 69 days. Drew and I got in my car (my poor poor car...it went to car heaven about a week later!) grabbed a bite to eat at Burger King and swiftly got to Riverside. We pulled out the stroller and headed up for the last walk up to the NICU. I was a ball of nerves. I was thrilled that Parker was finally coming home, but I was terrified.. I no longer had heart rate machines to count on, I no longer had a doctor around the corner or a nurse in the hall to run to. I had to trust my own instincts and take care of this boy without a hospital room around. We got up to his room, everyone was thrilled for us, but sad, because our little critter had become a NICU favorite, NICU pet if you will. We hugged anyone we could, signed paper works and packed up his room. Sadly, we couldn't use a stroller to take him out, so Drew took all the stuff we had accumulated out to the car and packed it up. I stayed with Parker and prepared him for his ride home. We sat him in his car seat...you can't even imagine how tiny he looked. We said our final goodbyes and out we went, accompanied by a nurse who pushed him out for us. (Security!) We savored every moment....his first elevator ride, his first time outside, people said bye as we walked out. I cried tears of joy...this was it...my baby was coming home. No more long walks to the NICU, no more machines, no more privacy issues. He was fully in my care, he was coming home, I was finally a full time mom. We drove home so carefully, talking, laughing, my in the back with Parker shooting pictures and video. Parker, the excited little 5lbs guy he was slept the entire time. We got home and parked in the parking lot. This was it, the 2nd best walk of my life. I got Parker out of the car and took his seat and we walked, up the stairs, around the corner and in the door. He was home, finally home....and my life, my life was complete!








Epilogue
I seriously don't think I have had a more exciting day since and I never would have imagined that I would enjoy such a simple thing. Last summer was, truly, the hardest time of my life, but bringing Parker home, made it all worth it. The past 5 months haven't always been easy, but I am so thankful for every moment I have spent with Parker. I said earlier in this post that I made the easiest/hardest decision of my life on May 29th. I say that because, yes, it was easy to say, "let's save this baby and me by getting it out" but it was so hard because I knew that I was having an emergency c-section, I was going to be completely under because I couldn't have an epidural for the safety of Parker. I knew I would be in the hospital longer than a normal c-section patient and I knew that Parker would be tiny and in the NICU for a while. It was so easy because I didn't want to die and I didn't want to lose this child, but is was so hard, because my life would change. I remember laying in the bed crying realizing what was about to happen. It was then that I decided I would cherish every moment I had with Parker. God taught me so much last summer and I learned the strength that I have. I am so thankful!

And now it's your turn....head over to MamaKat's and choose your own prompt to share. Make sure once you post it on your site, your go back to hers and put in your Mr. Linky.


The Prompts:

1.) Tell us about a memorable blind date.

2.) Other than the birth of a child or your wedding, write about a joyous moment.

3.) Write about one of the most difficult decisions you have made in your life.

4.) Share the best picture you took last month and explain why it's your favorite

Oh and btw I chose 2, but kind of covered 3!

Drew Gives Me the Happys!

My husband is an amazing guy and I want to brag on him for a little bit. Let me share with you some of his attractive inner qualities. (Because let's admit it, you don't need my telling you how much I like his bum!) So here are what I consider his top three qualities...

1) Understanding - he is an incredibly understanding man. For example, I have a tendency to get angry with him and completely shut down. A lot of times I am angry over stuff that makes no sense for me to be angry over. When I finally muster up the courage to tell him (for fear of an argument) he just listens and then talks it out with me. He rarely yells (unless I deserve a good lecture) and he always makes the attempt to understand. I would say about 95% of the time, he does understand, as much as he can and he allows me to get it all out.

2) Helpful - I love that he is very helpful. I have known many a man that refuses to do this or that, but not Drew. I am impressed that he is so hands on and helpful with Parker. I can remember him telling me he didn't like to and hadn't really changed many diapers...now, now he's an old pro at it. Also, he is helpful around the house, he cleans up, he does dishes, laundry, takes the garbage out, heck, he even makes dinner on occasion. Not only is he helpful to me, but he helps out his friends and co workers. He helps out at church and he often does it without being asked.

3) Loyal - I love his loyalty, especially with his friends and job. Don't get me wrong, he is loyal to me and I love that, but I see it most at work and with his friends. There are times when like any of us, our friends can get on our nerves or they make a terrible decision. Drew is always there to help them and stand by them. He cares deeply for them and you see that when he will talk to them on the phone just to listen or will put in any effort to find them something they can't find. At work, he is loyal too. He works hard and while some days can be tiresome, he is dedicated to his job and I know he won't turn his back on them!

What can I say, I love my hubby!!!

Head over to Mamas Losin It and learn the rules to writers workshop and choose from one of the prompts below. Make sure once you do yours, you go back to her site and post a link!

The Prompts:

1.) Describe your significant other's most attractive quality (on the inside).

2.) Tell about a time you stole something.

3.) Choose a poem you like. Take the last line and use it as the first line of your own poem. (creativewritingprompts.com)

4.) Write about a scary encounter with one of your old professors

Writer's Workshop

It's time for Writer's Workshop...hosted by MamaKat. Head over to to her site and get the rules!!


My Fur Baby....

I grew up on a farm and we had more cats than you can shake a stick at. It started with one simple one, Andy and quickly spiraled out of control. Strays would show up and we couldn't just turn them away....by the time I was married and leaving we had well over 10 cats (all outdoor cats!) I was never without an animal...I had hamsters, I had a dog, my brother had a rat at one point and then a hedgehog, my sister had a chinchilla, and my other brother had a bunny. We loved animals, so when I moved from that home and into my in-laws home after getting married...I went nuts. There were no animals it was quiet, I couldn't look out the window and see cats playing in the yard, my puppy wasn't there. Within a week of moving to Buffalo, I had talked Drew and his parents into letting my get a hamster. I needed something with fur, I was desperate here! By my birthday, 3 weeks later, I had talked with them and they were ok with me getting a cat. YAY!!!

So about a week after my birthday we went to one of the local rescue shelters. I had planned to get a kitten, but I quickly changed my mind. I walked around the "cat room" looking at each cat, I skipped over the older, bigger ones, I had no intentions of getting one, until I saw this beautiful grey cat....that was it, it was love at first site. We asked to take her out and play with her. The shelter had named her Geisha (no not as in Memoirs of a Geisha...we actually pronounce it Gee-sha). She was about 6 months old and she was beautiful, perfect.



We took her home with us, fully excited and ready to love on her. She was a true sweetheart. Our living room was in the basement so down there she stayed until we could get her declawed. Within about a week of her being home, she was being dropped off at the vet hospital to get her claws taken out. A few days later, she was home, we kept her in the basement until she was fully healed. Oh the fun we had with her little satellite dish on her neck. She wouldn't walk forward, nope, instead she was stuck in reverse. It was funny to watch. Once she was healed, she ruled the house...running up the stairs and down the stairs and up the stairs and down the stairs. And she was obsessed with the hamster Benji.



Here we are over 3 years later and oh the stories I have! Like, the first time we wanted to take her on a car trip. Bad idea. We were told we would have to sedate her, yah, that did not go over well. Within an hour of our trip we had decided to turn around and just leave her at home, making our 8 hour trip to indiana....more like 10. The next time we took her on a trip we didn't sedate her and she was totally fine. Geisha has an unhealthy obsession with plastic bags. When she was really little she would sleep in them. I could pick up the bag and carry her around. She still likes them, though now she prefers not to sleep in them. She used to LOVE to sleep on my neck or between my legs at night, now, she loved to stand on me and knead me. My cat hates outdoors. Oh, she acts like she wants to go outside, but as soon as you even attempt to her get out, she completely freaks out. The only truly weird thing is she will come out and sit on our back or front balcony with us.

I adore my daughter cat. She loves her brother, although most of the time she prefers to ignore him. When we brought him home, she was less than enthused. She wanted nothing to do with him, he'd cry, she'd hide, he'd be on my chest, she would ignore me completely. She did not want another human in this house. Though now she has completely warmed up to him. You may even catch her rubbing up against him on occasion!

She is bigger now, older, has gone through a lot of stages...from loving us, to hating us, to having no desire to be touched or held, to begging for it.







It's your turn!!!
Choose a prompt (or two or all), post it on your blog, and go to MamaKat's site and post it on her Mr. Linky!

The Prompts:

1.) Describe your latest obsession.

2.) Ask a loved one to use 6 descriptive words to describe you and report your findings. How well do they know you?

3.) Who was your first bloggy friend? How did you find each other? Do you still correspond?

4.) Tell us about your pet! If you have a weird infatuation with your dog or cat we want to hear about it (or if they just plain drive you crazy)...but please don't compare them to children. It's just not the same.


On two other notes.....

Please stop by Nate's site and wish his miracle baby, Gwyneth a happy 1 year birthday!!!

Also, please stop by Shannon's site and say a little prayer for her and her family, she is having heart surgery today.

Writer's Workshop

It is time, once again for MamaKat's writer's workshop! Today's prompts are:
The Prompts:

1.) Describe a New Year's where you would have been better off just staying home.
2.) What do you do that drives your mother crazy?

3.) Share your favorite gluten free recipe (hey, so what if I rig the topics to suit my life...)

4.) Close out 2008 with your own TOP 10 list!

Stop by her site for all the rules!!!

Top 10 Things I Learned in 08
(these do not relate to Parker/birth/pregnancy)

10. I make one heck of a turkey!
9. I learned that I should not attempt to open a bottle of wine! (Then again, maybe it was because it was the first time I had!)
8. I am stronger than I give myself credit for.
7. I can shop on a budget!
6. Aldi's was made for me!
5. I am addicted to made for tv movies (Hallmark and Lifetime anyone!?)
4. I am in love with blogger! I should have started a blog like this forever ago. Blogger rocks...no more xanga for me (well except to read those who still have it!)
3. I am addicted to blogging, reading other blogs, and doing things like writer workshop
2. Never put your milk in the back of the fridge (it freezes - or at least it did for me!)

And the number 1 thing I learned in 08, not related to Parker is.........
God is and will always be good!

Top 10 Things I Learned in 08
(these ARE related to Parker/birth/pregnancy)

10. I still hate hospitals!
9. Even if you have needles stuck in you every three to four hours for 5 days....NEEDLES STILL SUCK and hurt and I still want to gag when I see them.
8. Sure, that porcelain throne in the restroom looks all shiny and fun, but it is, in fact, not fun to have to stare into the bowl of it over and over and over!
7. God gave us doctors for a reason...and they care about me and my son...that's cool.
6. I am not alone in having a preemie and I am so fortunate to have made many friends who understand this battle!
5. More comes out then what goes in...seriously....how does one kid eat SO much and still have 4 times that amount come out. Of course, that could also be related to his reflux...well no, cuz it doesn't come out the bottom end like that :/
4. I love pregnancy clothes, seriously, they are stinking comfy!
3. Babies should REALLY come with manuals. (especially when you start solids...)
2. Parker has the best daddy in the world.

And the number 1 thing I learned in 08 related to Parker

I am SO blessed. I have an amazing son who means everything to me and I can't believe the amount and kind of love I feel for him.

Now it's your turn, go on over to MamaKat's site and get started. You can pick all or one of the prompts! Enjoy!

Oh and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! 09 is looking fine!

Writing Assignment!

One Crafty Mama has been doing this each week and this week I decided to go ahead and do it myself. For the rules head over to Mama's Losin' It! Sounds like fun, so here I go!

My Worst Dentist Experience EVER!!!
(although I actually have two!)

- The first one is just a dentist that really upset me as a little kid. He basically yelled at me for chewing gum and told me my teeth would fall out because they would get stuck to it. Can I tell you how long it took me to chew gum after that?

- The main one was when I got my wisdom teeth out. They gave me these pills I had to take like 5 hours prior...it was something to the affect of I had to take one the night before, one 3 hours before, one 2 hours before, one an hour before and then one at the office. Basically the medicine was to start sedating me. Well, I guess (this is what I hear, but I can remember things here and there) while I was at the dentist, they had to carry me in because I was so loopy that I could not walk. I was laughing really hard. At one point I was waiting in the waiting room and I was laughing and banging my head on the wall, falling out of the chair, saying my grandma was going to yell at me. I got home and was horribly sick for three days, I couldn't eat anything really for several days and my gums were swollen for a good couple weeks. I am convinced that something was done wrong. I haven't been to that dentist since. My grandma says that he messed up but wouldn't admit it.

Enjoy your writing assignment!