Guest Post - Cheryl from Lips Unzipped

I asked a new friend a couple weeks ago to share her preemie story. Unfortunately, last week I wasn't able to post her story because of a trip to Indiana and no internet, but this week, I am thrilled to introduce you to Cheryl from Lips Unzipped!

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Hi everyone!!! Denise recently asked if anyone would be willing to write a guest post on preemies, since it is prematurity awareness month! I’ll introduce myself a little bit and then get into the nitty gritty details! I’m Cheryl, a 28 year old mom to 2 beautiful little girls. Lauren who is almost 3 and Jillian who turned 1 in September. Married to my “soul mate” (sound sickening?? Well, I didn’t believe in soul mates either until I met Adam) we’ve been together for almost 10 years, married for almost 5.

My first daughter, Lauren was born at 38 weeks, 1 day. Via c-section. I had been having pretty regular contractions and she was sitting VERY low in my pelvis. I actually started with preterm labour on Christmas Eve of 2006. Lauren is my “atypically” developing child. No serious complications after birth, nothing that would ever clue me into problems we might have with subsequent children. My wish was always to have a large family, since I’m an only child. However, it didn’t work out that way!

Jillian is the icing to our cake, I guess. My worrying about her started at 12 weeks gestation. When I had the triple screen done to check for chromosomal defects. I went to the doctor and he told me that my levels for Downs Syndrome and Spina Bifida were raised. Adam and I opted to have an amnio, not that we would have done anything with the results, we just needed to know. Come to find out, Jillian’s chromosomes were all there, happy, healthy and accounted for. My doctor warned that it might be a placental problem, so, we’d have to keep an eye on it.

Now while I was pregnant, I met a wonderful friend Anna. Who actually had a 26 weeker. I visited them on a regular basis and hoped that I would be BEGGING Jillian to vacate my body. Almost a month after Noel was born, I was walking back from visiting him and noticed that my pants and underwear were wet. It was summer. I started making excuses about why it might be happening. “Maybe I peed myself?” (Jillian was also a frank breech presentation) “Maybe Jillian kicked something?” Lauren needed a nap, so, I laid down to get some rest when she fell asleep. When I stood up, I felt a small gush. I panicked. I was 29 weeks, 3 days. I immediately called Adam and asked him to come home.

Fast forward 4 days. My doctor and I had already discussed that I was going to have a repeat c-section. I REALLY wanted a VBAC, but, my uterine scar was thinning. I was put on complete hospital bedrest for 4 days. I was only allowed up to use the bathroom, oh and a 5 minute shower every 2 days, where a nurse would stand outside and knock when my time was up. I felt like a prisoner, but I was willing to do anything to keep Jillian inside! Luckily, Adam was able to stay home with Lauren and they made twice daily treks to the hospital.

September 8th, 2008 marked the day that Jillian entered our family. She was born at 30 weeks gestation. Jillian gave us a scare the night before she was born when her heart rate was up to 190 bpm. She settled down and I attempted to sleep. My doctor arrived in the morning (after being on call all night) and did an ultrasound. I was contracting every 10 minutes, but it wasn’t painful at all. I thought it was Braxton hicks and that it would go away. He checked my cervical length and dilation through the ultrasound since my water had broken, they didn’t want to introduce any bacteria. At 8am, I was completely closed, not effaced, feeling I had nothing to worry about.

By 10 o’clock, I was having to breathe through contractions and concentrate. I paged my nurse (who immediately came running because she knew I didn’t page them unless absolutely necessary) my nurse paged the resident on call. They were all trying to decide if they should take me to labour and delivery to monitor my contractions, or just take Jillian out. The resident decided to check to see if I were dilating. I had made it to 3 cms (in less than 2 hours). Since my blood pressure was so low, they couldn’t put me on ANY drugs to stop the contractions. So, it was go time. I asked them how long I had before we went to the OR. I was told 10 minutes, TOPS. I IMMEDIATELY called Adam and told him to get to the hospital. Thankfully a nurse and a social worker were able to watch Lauren. By the time my spinal was placed they checked me again and I was 6 cms dilated, guess it is true that you go faster with your second baby!

Since Jillian was breech, when the doctors lifted her out, they flashed me her bum before heading to the NICU. I was so upset to be separated from her, but, I knew she was in VERY competent hands. Considering her gestational age, it really surprised EVERYONE that she cried when she was born.
After spending 5 weeks in the NICU, Jillian FINALLY got to come home on Thanksgiving Monday (October 13, 2008- we’re Canadian, eh?!) I thought that our battle with prematurity was over . Sure, we had TONS of doctors visits and other things to keep her healthy, but I didn’t think we’d see any long term effects.

In November of 2008, Jillian was hospitalized briefly for a blue spell. She stopped breathing for 5 seconds, twice. HOW SCARY! They decided to do a head ultrasound while we were there (VERY common in preemies) they did see that she had a PVL and told me it could lead to Cerebral Palsy. Obviously devastated, I wanted to be able to fight for Jillian. We ended up having another head ultrasound in February of 2009. Fortunately, they saw that her PVL was gone. Adam and I were ecstatic. Unfortunately, her soft spot was fusing, so they didn’t get an accurate picture.

Jillian is developmentally delayed, with VERY high muscle tone in her legs and trunk. Depending on early intervention, we started therapies. In September of 2009, Jillian’s fabulous doctor decided that she needed a sedated MRI to see if there were any underlying causes of her delays and muscle tone. It was then we learned that the PVL wasn’t gone, in fact, it had gotten bigger. Obviously upset again, I decided we needed to fight harder for Jillian.

As of October 22nd, 2009, Jillian has been diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy. We don’t know the type or severity yet as we have to see what Jillian will do on her own. Our hopes are high that Jillian will over come this, but we also have to be realistic about the whole thing. Jillian’s CP is a result of her early birth. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would have a “special needs” baby. Not that I’m close minded or anything like that. But, I think we as parents NEVER want to hear that there is something wrong with your child.

We are now awaiting so many specialists I don’t know when I’ll ever be able to sleep. Jillian is our icing on the cake, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

My Famous Friends...

Please meet the Tavinao family!


I have had the privilege of knowing this beautiful family for 3 years now and I adore each of them. Gabe and Marla and their 3 daughters, Livi, Ava and Nina just make my heart so happy. Gabe is an amazing website designer. He has designed not only both his and Marla's personal blogs, but also our church's as well as many many others. And Marla, oh man, where do I start when it comes to this woman. Her heart is so big and she is lovely. She is a writer that has written From Blushing Bride to Wedded Wife, Is That All He Thinks About, Changing your World, One Diaper at a Time, and her most recent Expecting. She is one of the sweetest and caring people I know. She has cheered me up and offered advice to me many a time. Their girls, the cutest stinking girls ever! (though they don't stink).

Just a normal american family, living in a normal american town, trusting God always and loving Him even more. A family who also loves to take pictures (I borrowed the one above) and who love animals. So when they decided to do 52 Zoos in 52 Weeks and Marla wanted to right a book about it, I wasn't too surprised. And they did it too, last Saturday was the big zoo 52 and we had a party at our home zoo here in Columbus.

Now all of a sudden, this family is being thrown into the spotlight. 10tv, one of our local stations started this and boy has it become a big thing. Being featured on the internet and this Saturday being able to share their story LIVE on the early show. I mean really?

I am so proud of them. Marla keeps posting tweets and what not about trusting God and this being bigger than what they had expected and that's true! God is certainly up to something and I am so glad to know this family and watch them share the Lord even if they aren't able to come right out and say it (though they normally do!)

And hey, now I can say I have famous friends, right? I am so thankful to know them and so thankful to see them representing God like they are and I pray that this publicity will be for God's glory!

I love you guys and I am rooting for you!

Here is the 52 Zoos info!

And enjoy getting to know my friends! They are like awesome and stuff!

Getting really upset.

I seriously don't get it...I don't get people today.

i do not understand where people get off coming to people's personal blogs and putting them down, criticizing them, treating them like crap.

I do not understand how you can take a picture of a sweet miracle child and put horns on the picture saying she is the devil child.

I do not understand how insensitive people can be towards a family who's daughter is fighting for her life.

You were not FORCED to read their blog. If you didn't like it, you shouldn't have kept reading it. Now, thanks to your heartlessness and just plain rudeness a family I have been praying for for months, is possibly closing down their blog. Does this make you small minded, mean hearted people feel better? That your words and actions have caused pain to a family and to their friends who care about them. What, do you enjoy doing this.

It isn't the first time it's happened to blog friends, or myself.

If you don't want to hear what someone has to say, don't put in that effort to read a blog.

I pray that you will see the pain you have caused and be forever regretful.

I am so sick of negative commenters on blogs and people who put others down. I just don't get it.

The End.

I am so ticked, angry, sad - add more words here.

As a preemie parent, I do my best to follow other preemie blogs to not only have some support, but to give support and see that it is ok and no matter what, things will be ok. I started following a blog about a little boy who was a the same weight as Parker when he was born and then the mother introduced me to another blog. The little girl, Dakota was a 29 weeker just like my Parker and so I began to follow the story. It was great to read all the positive things that would happen to the little girl. She is beautiful beyond words and I really fell for her.

Today, I went to the site to check up on little D. and it was blocked, odd I thought. But then again, the mom hadn't updated since last week. Oh well...

Then I began talking with my friend K (the mom that introduced me to the blog) and she told me what happened and my mouth dropped open, I am still pretty sure that I haven't found my chin yet.

I am DEVASTATED AND ANGRY AND SAD!

Read why here.

The only words I have is WOW, HOW, WHY and poor D.

I am so angry...but I am praying for the family, because I just can't do anything else!

My Mother's Day Gift Guide!

I have been thinking a lot about mother's day this year. It's my first one with a child (though I did celebrate it last year!) and I count myself lucky to be able to celebrate it. Though I realize you should not need a day to celebrate moms, I plan to enjoy it! I truly believe this year is going to be one of my best because I get to dedicate my son on this day! This just thrills me.

I have been thinking a lot about gifts. I have no idea what I would want. While I need/want new clothes I don't want them for mothers day. I thought I wanted something sentimental, but I am not sure about that either, the last thing I really need is another necklace or picture frame. I have been searching the internet, reading other blogs and I have come up with my list of Mother's Day gift ideas (hunny, are you paying attention???) Parker, is daddy paying attention for you??? (These are in random order)

1. The Pouchee
- Not that my purse is horribly unorganized, but it would be nice to have a way to change purses easier. I am also too the point where I don't always carry a purse, what with an almost one year old and his stuff, I tend to throw my stuff in his diaper bag or a canvas bag and go. I am almost sick of trying to balance a purse, a diaper bag, ect. I certainly think this would be helpful. Plus, my friend Sandy, has one and loves hers and well, she's getting me to love them too!

2. The Fumi Purse Hook
- Did I not just say that I don't want to carry my purse as much? Well, its true, but I do plan to carry it when out with a friend or on a date with the hubby! This little doodad is super cute and practical. Rather than sitting my purse on the ground in who knows what, it keeps it up off the floor! How handy is that! No more bending over to pick it up, no sitting it in nasty sticky stuff. It makes life a little easier! Plus, its fashionable! Oh and this is another thing Sandy owns and it's too cute!

3. Gladiator Sandals and or Flip Flops!
- Sure I said I didn't want clothes, but I didn't say I didn't want shoes! I love me some shoes, especially sandals - especially gladiator style and flip flops. It's in my humble opinion that sandals are fantabulous and everyone should own them! I am not a huge fan of the gladiator sandals that go up really high, but I certainly would love something like these:


4. Planters/Flowers
- I grew up always helping my grandma planting flowers in the spring. While I loathe bees, I love flowers and I miss having flowers around. I live in an upstairs apartment, so I have no actual ground area to plant flowers, but I do have front and back balconies. I have been thinking a lot about getting some planter boxes and planting flowers. I have one small flower pot (it currently has very DEAD plants in it) but I would love to have more. Just a small garden in a box! Heck, maybe even some hanging flower pots would be nice too. There are hooks that I could use to hand some up. I just really need some flowers or something.


5. An Outdoor Oasis
- I would love to make my front balcony another room! I would be out there ALL the time! I'd love to get an outdoor rug, a couple of plants, a cute little bistro table and chair set and make a little outdoor living area. As it stands right now, my patio has a green blanket on it (for when Parker is out playing so he doesn't sit on wood, and a foldable lawn chair!

6. Spa Day/Massage
- Seriously, what mom would not like this. Oh man, I would love to have a day of pampering with out the kiddo. I'd love a nice professional massage, get my hair done, soak in hot tub, just a day to myself.

7. Esty Gift Card
- I am obsessed with Etsy. I love handmade, unique, thoughtful items. I love looking at all the creative items on etsy and would love a gift card so that I could get some things.

8. Pictures of Parker
- As it stands right now, I do not have any pictures of Parker hung in the house. I have wedding pictures and that's about it. I'd love some 8x10's to hang up, that would be super awesome! I'd love to have enough to where I could make a collage on my wall.

9. Blog Design
- I would love to have my blog updated with a nice design by someone who makes layouts. I came across a great website of someone who does designs as a way to raise money to go on volunteer/humnaitarian trips. The name of her site is Blogs for a Cause! It's a great way to not only get a nice gift for mother's day, but also support someone else. And I have to say, she does great work!

10. Organizing Needs
- On thing I have been working hard on is organizing my home. Making things easier to find, while de-cluttering and giving items homes. I would love to go to the container store or really anywhere and just get a bunch of different items to help with my organizing. I have done quite a bit of work so far (especially in my kitchen) and I would love to keep going at it. I am sick of the clutter and the messes!

Well there you have it, 10 ideas for Mother's Day gifts. Also, I am a huge fan of handmade things by your children. I still make handmaid gifts, cards ect for others and I believe it adds a special touch to a gift to know that your child put in effort to make you something!



I also had the chance to post this over at Blissfully Domestic, one of my favorite sites for all things domestic, blissful and useful. This site is amazing, it always has awesome articles, anything from home decor ideas to being blissfully you! Check it out: Blissfully Domestic.

Tidbits - What's on my mind!

Hi friends!

Today on Tidbits I am going to share a little bit of everything on my mind!

March of Dimes Walk
Yesterday was the walk! Because it was the first year that I did it I wasn't sure what to expect. I had these ideas in my head, but you can only be so prepared. Let me tell you, it was way more exciting and long than I expected. I certainly didn't expect 5 miles to be so long...it doesn't seem like it would be long, but holy cow! I am proud to say that we did finish the 5 miles with very few stops (towards the end I did start to get sick, thank goodness for Steak and Shake!) We finished strong and very proud to have been a part of such a great event. Yes, I even shed a tear or two or 70. There were a ton of other's there, though I have clue what the actual number was! My team consisted of Drew, Parker and me, as well as our friends Teresa, Kim and Kara and one of my blogger friends even walked with us (Thanks C.). We ran into one of Parker's nurses from the NICU! That was exciting and unexpected and so good! We didn't get to see anyone else, though she did say there were some others there! It was cool to see other family teams and their posters. Ours was out and I was so excited, I am also excited because we got to keep it if we wanted to! Parker did so so good! I was expecting a meltdown from being too hot or not getting a diaper change - but no, he sat in his stroller with his incredibly cute outfit and played with his toys and talked! I think we finished in an hour and 45 minutes. After the walk we spent the afternoon resting (while Parker spent it playing!). I am not too sore today, my blister on my foot hurts, and the random sunburn I got on only one arm and only on the back! Pictures to come - I haven't dumped the camera!

Saturday
Saturday was a good day too - just really busy. That morning, Parker and I got up early and went to a soccer game to cheer on M. He is the son of my good friend C and B and we promised him we'd come to a game. He adores Parker and visa versa. His team did well and won!!! We came home and our friend Teresa came over to help me make our team shirts! (We were the only team there with hand maid shirts!) After she left I headed to a coupon class hosted by Ellen of ThriftyChicMom. She is an insane (good insane) couponer and she shared her tips! I look forward to getting into it. I have clipped coupons, but I have never been so organized and thoughtful in my shopping. After that I went grocery shopping for a little bit of stuff and came home and relaxed.

Parker
This little man is giving mommy and daddy headaches! He gets into everything, pulls up on everything, bumps his head on everything (nothing serious) and is just running amuck! This weekend he has started crawling more and more and he pulls up on anything he can. It's crazy to think a week ago he barely did anything but roll and now...yah, not so much. He's such a big boy and he is doing so well!

Today I am going to do some spring cleaning! Our house is so cluttered and especially our walk in closet - A MESS! i am planning on getting some new clothes since I can't fit into most of my summer clothes from last year. We are going to tennessee in two weeks so I want to get some new things for that trip. Also, I need to get all the winter clothes put away too. Plus, with how sore I am it will be a good break before I am busy later this week!

I am done, thanks for reading my novel! I hope to get pictures up later today of the walk!

Guest Post!!!

Hello there everyone!

I am excited to let you know that my good friend Sandy has asked me to do a guest post on her blog! I am even more excited that she has allowed me to share Parker's story and prematurity awareness on her blog that typically is all about organizing! Please hop over to her blog and take a gander at the post!

Also, I want to welcome any visitors that might have read my guest post! Thank you for coming by my site to learn more about me and my family! Please feel free to browse around and come back anytime. If you want you can follow me on twitter or follow my blog! If you have any questions, please ask!

Have a great day!

Maddie Sphor

A precious girl, who passed away suddenly. My heart aches for this family...

Here is the link about it: Maddie's Information

I really don't know what to say. My heart is broken for this family. It makes me really enjoy Parker even more. It makes me cry.

Sigh.

TidBits: HAHA moments, TN, Grocery, Parker

It's time for another issue of Tidbits. Tidbits is where I basically write all that is in my head. A little bit of this, a little bit of that.

1) I am happy to report that Mr. Parker precious pants is back to his normal breathing self. Last time he had any form of his inhaler was a week ago! He is acting as if nothing really happened. I still have to be careful with him, but I think it's all over with. I hope that his breathing issues never happen again, but with every challenge I realize that I am a great mom and know my son. I am sad in a weird way that he is no long on his steroids. They cleared up his eczema beautifully, but it's back...but at least it's not every part of his body, it's really just his cheeks and knees and his arms. I am continually rubbing lotion on him. It's frustrating, but with this nicer weather, it's not nearly as bad as it had been!
- 2 Quick Questions: 1) How do I teach Parker to use a cup? well a sippy actually. Is there anything I can do to help him realize you don't chew it, you suck? 2) If you baby has an allergic reaction to something, how do you know the difference between that and say just eczema?
Now I am not saying that Parker had an allergic reaction, but I just was wondering if maybe part of his breathing issue was due to one. It was the first day he had tried beef and he ended up in hospital. Granted I think his breathing had started out that day being more rough than normal, but not as bad until the evening. I feel like I am questioning myself and all I do for Parker. But maybe the hospital would have noticed if it were an allergic reaction - don't you think?

2) Moving along - I have to say, I find myself amused by random things. For example today, I am leaving the grocery. I am getting ready to pull out of my spot and I see this precious little old lady attempting to pull into a handicap spot. She totally missed it and ends up parking in the striped part. She sits there for a minute and realizes she didn't make it into the actual spot. I don't know, but I found it humorous. You know what else I find humorous? That I hate drinking wine, but I use it to cook with. They say only cook with wine you would drink - well what do you do when you wouldn't drink it? I think it tastes awful personally, I love cooking with it though because the alcohol cooks out. I think it's funny. Also funny - attempting to purchase wine when I know squat about it.

3) Speaking of the grocery - I have found the perfect time for me to go - 10am on Monday morning. I scored some awesome meat deals, there was no one in the store really, I got to take my time and compare prices and think through things. I loved it. And Drew got to be with daddy here at home so I didn't have to deal with him (though he would have been fine!) I am attempting to use coupons more...it helps!

4) I am getting so excited and giddy about May! On May 10th our church will be holding a dedication time during service. I will be dedicating Parker at that service (no it is not baptism). It happens to be mother's day too, what a great day. Also exciting, Drew's parents are coming down to be there during Parker's dedication. I am hoping maybe some of my family with come from Indiana, it would be awesome to have them, but I don't want to pressure them. Anyways, on the 11th - that monday - we are headed to Tennessee for a week. We are going to Knoxville and I finally get to meet Drew's grandma and grandpa and they will get to meet Parker too. We are going to go to Gatlinburg, Panther Creek State Park and other fun places. We are also going to Mt. Vernon indiana to see Drew's aunt and uncle. We may get to stop in Nashville! I am so excited for our trip, I can't wait to go on a proper family vacation.

This weekend we are heading to Cincinnati to see our friend's The Vinson's who moved to MN a few years back. I haven't seem them in almost a year and I miss them. Heather and I were roommates and I love her to death. I turned to her a lot during my pregnancy and even the first months of Parker's life. She is one of my BFFs! I can't wait. I also get so see some other college buddies too, we are having a cookout at the Reasor's; Brandee was my roommate the last year of college. And the Hobb's - almost all of the CCU posse.

I think that is all I have for today, other than to stay in prayer for Stellan and the MckMama family (see my other post from today.)

Love you all! Glad to be back in the swing of blogging!

A Big 'Ol Update

Hello Friends,

I feel like I have not been around much to update this blog. I apologize, things have been a little crazy in my life recently! But I am happy to report that today, I have an update for all of you - and a good one at that!

PARKER

The Critter is doing awesome! He is a little ball of energy that keeps us very busy now-a-days. He is 9 months old now. Just typing that is strange. I can not believe he is just 3 months away from being a year old. It was just about this time last year that I felt my first flutter and now, that little flutter is a beautiful baby boy. He is almost able to sit up on his own now. He does do it, but not for long - maybe a minute or two. He is rolling all over the place, scooting on the floor a little too. He is doing so well! He is such a good boy.

THIS PAST WEEKEND!

This past weekend was a great one - although it has left my insanely tired. My hubby had a 5 day weekend and so we got to enjoy lot of time together. Friday, as you all know, I got my hair chopped off and I do still love it. Yesterday, though I was ready to shave my head, the stupid wind made my hair be more poofy than normal, but I think, even with this hair cut, it looked fine! I did also burn my neck on the curling iron! Ow!

Saturday was a long day. It started with choir practice at 9 am. We are going to be singing some AWESOME songs this Easter! I love them! They are fun and so worthy of goosebumps. I had a hard time making it through practice, just because I was tired and I don't do so well being up early in the morning - and add in having to sing...yah, not a pretty picture!

After practice I headed over to Panera and got myself prepared for a meet up with some fellow bloggers from the area. I tell you what, these ladies where lovely and gave me some amazing insight into blogging and taking it to another level. I was able to meet 5 other blogging moms.
- Ali from Blessed Treehouse was one of them, I know her in real life though, we go to church together, were in a small group together and are good friends. But of course, I have to include her...because well, like the other women, she is incredible!
- Sandy from Organize with Sandy. She can come organize my horribly unorganized home anytime :)
- Lacie from Peanut Butter and Pickle Reviews. She as well as the others helped me learn a lot about making blogging more than just updates.
- Ellen from Thrifty and Chic Mom. She introduced me to the world of couponing - which I intend to start. She also gave me great insight into other things related to blogging as well.
- And finally Christina from A Mommy Story. Another lovely women, who sadly I didn't get a lot of time to know, but the talking we did do, was fun!
It was great to connect with other women who have been doing this longer or have made it a bigger part of their life. I want to learn more and not only have this blog, but another one.

Saturday evening, Drew and I were able to go over to our friend's the B's house and have a fun night of games with them and their kiddos. We were introduced to the world of Sorry Sliders and Uno Flash! Talk about fun! We love this family and are so thankful for their friendship. They are even going to be praying over us when we dedicate Parker at church (May 10, 10:30am if you want to come!)

Sunday, yesterday, was another long day! We went to church, I didn't get to be in the actual service, I was in the nursery, but we started the 40 days before Easter stuff. I heard the sermon was great - I do know the set up was awesome...I will have to post a picture of our stage, but to give you an idea...a cross, a HUGE chain link fence in front of it and "stuff" blocking the way. It looked great! And my stroller, blanket and christmas tree were used. The creative team at our church is AWESOME! After church was a membership meeting which we went to. I think we were techinally already members (we've been with VIsta since day 1) but they were basically putting it in writing now, because have grown so much in two years! It was a good meeting.

After church we dropped Parker off at Mandi's and she watched him while Drew and I went to a movie - "He's just not that into you." Really good movie, really really good!

THE OTHER BLOG

I mentioned this some on Sat. But I am hoping, planning, thinking of, making another blog. I will keep this one of course and it will be my personal one, but I really want to do one where I can reach more people, where I can do giveaways, reviews, ect. Make it more of a specific blog (much like Ellen, which is mostly about saving money...or Lacie's which is all about reviewing). I am hoping to do one that reaches out to others who have a preemie, are going through the NICU experience, are going to go through it, went through it, brought home a preemie, ect. It's on my heart to reach out to parents who went through or who are going through what I went through. There are a lot of us out there and I want to make a place for them to come and feel like they aren't the only ones. That's really all I know. I don't want to be a huge giveaway or review site, though I certainly plan to do a little bit here and there. I just feel so stuck...I don't know how to bring it into fruition. So pray that I can really start to hunker down and figure it out. Also, if you have an idea of a name, let me know, because I am not sure what to name it either. I'd like it to be welcoming to all parents if possible, giving tips that we all can use (much like my recent discussions on mommy guilt!). I had the though of a name like "Small Miracles" but I am not at all set on it and I want the name to reflect that is more than that...I just feel stuck.

Along with this, I am planning to learn more about hosting ad's, affiliate programs, ect. My mind is a hot mess.

MOMMY GUILT ROUND UP!

I finished the book I was reading - "Motherhood, the Guilt that keeps on giving." I learned a lot and am thinking of (eventually) doing a giveaway of the book. Tomorrow, I plan to post on the things I learned and share some insight from the final chapters of the book. I tell you what, I have really learned what real vs. fake guilt looks like (although it can still be hard sometimes to not give into the fake guilt).

Check out the new book I am reading!

IN CLOSING

I want to say that I am so thankful for this blog, a place where I can share and learn and meet new people. It's great to have a community like this. You all are such a blessing to me, seriously! I am thankful for you! VERY VERY thankful! :)

Have a great day!

I want to reach out....

I am currently sitting here at Panera with 5 other mommy bloggers and loving my time. It's very helpful for me because I am still so new in the blogging world.

For a while now I have wanted to do more than just this personal blog. I would love to start another blog, where I do giveaways and make if focused on a certain area. What I would love to do is a blog reaching out to parents with preemies or parents who are currently living "in" the NICU and raising preemies. It's something that's on my heart, its a passion that I have and I want to make this site for those. I know there are a lot out there, I know we could all use the network and a way to reach out to each other.

But I need help - HOW DO I EVEN START THIS? What would I name this site?

Oh boy, I want to do this, I would love to be able to launch this maybe by the end of March?

Wooo...so pray for me as I figure this out and feel free to help me out, especially those of you who have giveaway/review sites where its more than just personal site, it's a site where you have a specific topic of your site.

Email me (email to the side) and shoot me ideas/sites that will help, what should I "do" on my blog. I am feeling really stuck!

6 Things that Never Fail to make me smile!

6 Things that Never Fail to make me smile :)

1) My son, his giggles, coos and everything about him.

2) Puppies/Kitties, animals in general

3) My hubby

4) My friends

5) A good stupid movie :)

6) Nature and all its amazing beauty.

Your turn!

(I am planning on doing a better update later...)

Writer's Workshop: And Ode to Parker

An ode to my baby boy - Parker!!!


About nine months go you came,
Bursting into my world.
Cute as a button small as could be,
Dear son of mine, how I adore thee.

Emergency c-section brought you into my life.
Frightening was the choice to make, but
God gave me the strength to choose,
Having you, that was worth it.

I can’t believe how well you’ve done.
Jumping hurdle after hurdle
Keeping steady all along.
Learning and growing just like you should.
My strong boy, you’re doing so well.

Never doubt yourself and strength
Ordinary, you are not.
Parker, my life, my love, my light
Quitting is not an option.

Rough was your start, hard it might have been.
Son, you’ve done so well, can’t you tell,
That I am proud of all you do.
Unbelievable, baby, that’s what you are.

Very loved and very blessed.
What a miracle you are to me.
XOXOXO
Your Mommy Loves you
Zero, no, you are a ten!

- Sorry if this poem is kind of lame or strange, I have never claimed to be a poet - add in that each line had be the next letter in the alphabet, and well, you get this! I think it's good considering my lack of poet-ness!


Now it's your turn, choose a prompt below, post it on your blog and then head over to Mama Kat's site and post your name and post in Mr. Linky!

The Prompts:

1.) For your birthday a sibling has decided to have the first six months of your blog printed and bound. Write a forward for the book.

2.) Write a 26-line poem using all the letters of the alphabet, where the first line starts with the letter "A," the second "B," the third "C," etc., culminating with the final line starting with "Z."
(writersdigest.com)

3.) Start your story with, "In retrospect, I wouldn't say it was my best idea." And end it with, "And that's how I attempted to make this world a better place.
(writersdigest.com)

4.) What would the truth have done? Write about a time when honesty was NOT the best policy.
(writingfix.com)

5.) What made your childhood bearable? Write about it.

Are You Busy Tomorrow???

Tomorrow between 11 am and 12pm EST my friends Adam and Amiee will be doing a live interview on MSNBC so share the story of their daughter Kayleigh. I know a lot of you follow there blog, but i want to make sure to share their blog and amazing story with all of you!

Kayleigh's Blog

I know I will be watching and I hope you do too!

Around the Blogasphere.

Hello Friends,

I am sick today and slept in until 1pm (how I managed that with 9 month old I will never know.) I don't really know what to talk about today...as my brain is ceasing in function, but I do want to highlight some of my favorite posts from blogs today to give you some things to read.

1) I know Ali in real life, we go to church together and I adore her! She just started a new blog called Blessed Treehouse and every Tuesday is doing a Practically Green Vlog. Because I am slowly going towards the "green way" I am loving this! Today she give a really handy tip that I myself just started....Check Out Her Vlog!

2) I just recently came across this blog and am IN LOVE with it! Seriously! The wonderful woman has been doing a series on organizing your pantry and kitchen. I NEED this...and she gives great tips...go check out her blog Simple Home Living!

3) I don't know Sandy in real life, yet, (I am meeting her this weekend!) but I can tell you her blog is so helpful. She is a professional organizer and shares her skills and tips in her blog, Organize with Sandy! While not all tips may be exactly something I am dealing with, I can always use bits and pieces here and there. She recently had a guest blogger share about organizing your coupons - SO HELPFUL! Check out the post here!

4) Another blog I just came across not to long ago and enjoy reading is "The Peterson's Go Public." Jennifer is real and honest and I love that. She is sharing some bittersweet moments with her blogging friends right now and being honest and open about her feelings. Check out here blog here.

5) One last thing I want to share with all of you is Blissfully Domestic. I love this site, it has a lot of useful information and also fun things all in one place. I have learned a ton of different things on this site - from recipes, to organization tips, to funny stories, it is a great site!

Enjoy reading some other sites today! I hope I won't be so sick tomorrow!

The Beautiful 16

Dear Friends,

Please meet the most beautiful children I have ever seen. These are the orphans that call the orphanage my church sponsors home. The are lovely kids, a delight, amazing, beautiful.


Asia's Hope: Cambodia from Clay Productions on Vimeo.

Please meet Jen, a good friend who is a missionary over in Cambodia loving our children.


Here I Am from Clay Productions on Vimeo.


Today, my good friend and amazing author, Marla Taviano will be donating all monies collected from book sales to our orphanage over in Phnom Phen. Please consider buying a book, or two, or three, prices are dropped today only!

- For information on our orphanage please visit: An Asian Vista
- To learn more about Marla's special book sales day please visit: Marla's Website
- For more information on Asia's Hope, the organization that we are partnered with please visit: Asia's Hope
- For more information on my church please visit: Vista Community Church

I hope that you consider helping out, but understand if you can't. But I would ask that you please take a moment to pray for our orphanage...the kids and Jen too! Thanks for allowing my to share this opportunity with you!

Tidbits - Friendship, Guilt, Drama, Fri. 13th stinks!

Another tidbits post - this one, just as random as the last!

- Yesterday was a very hard day for hubby and me. A very close friend of ours has been going through some rough stuff and we have been supporting her the best we can. Well yesterday it all came to a head. She kicked out her hubby and while at her parents her hubby and mom got into it. He decided to draw us into the middle of it and make some STUPID and COMPLETELY unwarranted accusations. (He is convinced my hubby and his wife are together behind his back. I should note that I trust Drew 100%, I know he is faithful and I know that "meanie head" was making these accusations out of anger and hurt. He wants to take the heat of himself and put it on someone else who's done nothing wrong.) I of course was hurt and angry by said accusation and I know, as should everyone else that it's total poo and that the ding dong is just that - a ding dong! (I think it's all be resolved as of right now.) Anyways our friend has decided that she thinks its best that none of us talk right now, as she doesn't want us to get hurt anymore. She won't return calls, emails, texts, nothing and it hurts. We love her dearly and we don't want her to go through all of this alone, but if this is what she feels is best we have to trust that. I prayed hard last night for the situation...and I continue to pray! I trust that God will get us all through this!

- Also yesterday I some how found myself in the middle of another problem. While I can't go into details with this one - I will tell you three key words - drama, anger, pregnancy issues. God knows the situation, so feel free to pray for it! I am concerned for my friend and her pregnancy and the unneeded drama.

- And these two things alone are why I hated Friday the 13th!

- However, I got my prize in the mail I won during the contest carnival I posted about a few weeks ago. It's a really cute keychain made for me, with the colors I wanted by a very talented blogger! I love it - its brown with blue dots! I love love love it! When I got it, it made my Friday the 13th just a little bit better!

- I am still reading through the book, Motherhood: The Guilt That Keeps On Giving and I am working through understand true guilt and false guilt. I would say about 90% of the guilt I feel is false guilt, maybe even more! I've learned that a lot of times with guilt in mommyhood, it's false guilt, it isn't that you did anything wrong but you feel you did. For example - one of the biggest things I feel guilty for is the circumstance surrounding Parker's birth and then stay at the NICU. I feel so guilty about it - but the truth it, I did nothing wrong, in fact I did everything right. So why can't I let go of this guilt? I don't know, but I am working on it. One thing I do feel guilty for that I am actually guilt of is ignoring Parker when he cries at times. Sometimes I simply do not want to deal with it...so I ignore it. Then 2 minutes later - I deal with it. False vs. True guilt - vague vs. obvious. It makes sense. The great thing I was reminded of is that Parker won't remember half the things I feel guilty for. He's not going to remember being poked by several needles, he's not going to remember me accidently biting him when he had his hand near my mouth and I was talking, he's not going to remember me spilling milk all over his face when I forgot to tighten the nipple and cap on the bottle....well unless I write about it and he finds this blog someday...in which case - Parker, I adore and and I am sorry! So what about you, do you know true guilt vs. false guilt? Maybe make a list and see what you realize, you'd be surprised! I am almost done with this book and will be moving on to a new one. Which of course I will share with you!

- Happy Valentines Day!

- Tomorrow my little sister turns 20, wow...I feel old (yah, I am only 26)

- Off to make some grilled cheese and tomato soup...mmmmmmmmmmm!

Writer's Workshop: Current Loves...

You know the old song right: "Rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens. Brown paper packages tied up with string, these are a few of my favorite things..."? Well if you don't then you are missing out on a great movie (I digress). Below, is a list of my current 5 favorite things...enjoy!

1) The Tibetan Mastiff


So the other night while Prez. O was talking, I decided to find something else to watch and ended up watching the Westminster Dog Show. I love watching dog shows and I love seeing all the dogs (even though sometimes I find them very weird looking!) I love dogs! Well, this kind of dog was on and I simply fell in love with the beautiful big puppy called the Tibetan Mastiff. Personally, I like big dogs but when I think big, I think Golden Retriever - but when I say the mastiff on the dog show, it was at that moment I decided I will own one someday.

2) Coke Zero


Technically I have liked this drink for a long time. But it's only been recently that I have deemed it my favorite soda - winning out over Dr. Pepper and regular Cherry Coke. I am obsessed with this drink...I. Love. It.

3) Shout


How can I NOT love this stuff? With an 8 month old that always gets more on him then in him, I enjoy spraying Shout on all of his garments. Sadly we have some permeant stains on some of his bibs (this is before I discovered the amazing power of Shout!) but that's ok...at least his clothes aren't stained!

4) Confessions of a Teen Idol


This show is on VH1 and it brings together former Teen Idols in an effort to reintroduce them to the world of being an A lister. It's really interesting seeing this idols realize the different world there is as a celebrity. To be honest, I don't really recognized an of them, except for the one from Grease 2. But I like seeing them learn that things are different and be honest with their struggles. It's slightly addicting at times!

5) Baby Lap Time at the Library


So almost 2 weeks ago I took Parker to lap time at the library. I fell in love with it. I would have taken him Monday again, but we had our great car issue of 09 (lets hope it remains the only car issue!) and then Parker got sick :( But I have been trying to do some of the stuff at home with what I have. Parker seems to do well with it. I love it! I am hoping to start the habit of taking him every monday (or as much as I can). He enjoys it and I want him to get in to reading and love it. Unlike his mommy who sadly, only just took to reading recently (and when I do read, I am picky!). I actually want him to read like his daddy (who I tell daily that if he reads anymore his head will explode!)

So there you have it my current 5 favorite things (in no particular order). I could have gone on to name a couple more things, but I stuck with these 5.

So now it's your turn...

Directions:
For you newbies it's never to late to jump in!! Here is what you must do. Choose a prompt that inspires you most. Write. Come back Thursday and paste your blog URL into the Mister Linky that will be up...this way anyone can click on your name and head over to your place to see what you wrote.

Feel free to write on more than one prompt if you so desire. I do it all the time, but it's my game...and I don't know how to shut-up...so it should be expected. And remember the more comment love you give, the more comment love you get so comment comment away.

The Prompts:

1.) What was the first CD (or record or cassette) you ever purchased? Write about the way that particular album made you feel then. Write about how it makes you feel now.
writersdigest.com

2.) You were recently laid off. Instead of moping around, you've viewed it as a chance to start fresh. Pick a new career and write about your first day on the job.
writersdigest.com
3.) List your five most recent favorite things.

4.) I'm hungry. Share your very favorite recipe!!

Head over to Mama Kat's site after you have chosen your prompt and post your post to Mr. Linky!

Tidbits - Parker, BlogHer 09

Hello Friends!

Well, I wasn't really sure what to write today...mainly because I don't have anything profound or thoughtful to talk about. My brain is fried. Being up with a sick kid last night and then being with him all day my brain is stuck in some hazy area of sickness. The good news is today at the doctor he confirmed that Parker has a nasty cold. Thankfully, his lungs are fine and sound perfect. Talk about relief, with the cough he has I was sure it was worse. But nope, it's not and it already sounds a bit better! He's needy and honestly, I like it, I miss my cuddly baby. I miss him being littler and wanting to be swaddled and nuzzled. He's been my little buddy and I love it. I just hate that he is sick and that's why he wants it. But he should be fine! Woohoo!!!!

In an on-going effort to make myself and this blog more interesting, I just joined the site BlogHer in hopes to not only meet new people, but also learn more about making this blog more than just a random site of my musings! I am constantly falling in love with the idea of making a more informative blog, but remaining myself and still doing my silly things I do. As I was looking around BlogHer, I came across this BlogHer Conference '09. I really really want to go, just not sure about any of the details in how to do that. To be honest our money is tight, so I don't actually know if I can go or not. I have a lot of details to work out...money, travel, companion?, Parker/babysitter, ect. I don't know...but I do know that I would enjoy it and am praying that somehow God will help me work this out. I already missed Blissdom 09 and I keep drooling over the details I read on other blogs and twitter about it. So I really really hope this works out, anyone want to come with me?

Other than that, I have not much more to say...wait, no, scratch that. I do want to say something else. I love blogging. I love the freedom and release it gives me and I love that I get to share myself with you. This is why I am hoping to work out the BlogHer conference, because I want to dig deep into this "blogging" idea and really stretch myself creatively. I also want to use this blog to reach others who have been blessed with preemies! But mostly, I just want to learn, grow and meet more amazing people through this blog. That is super important to me. I am shy and so doing things this way is teaching me alot about myself. In the future, I hope to make this blog more organized, fun, and a little more professional-ishy looking! To those of you who read this blog faithfully, thank you, it means the world to me. To the new readers, welcome and I hope you enjoyed my blog enough to come back. Remember, I am still new to all of this (I have been "blogging" for years - using xanga...but this to me is like more than blogging, it's a new "home".

Ok, I am out for the night! :)

Praying For Tuesday/Fun Foods Friday

Head over to this site and say a prayer for this family. My heart is just breaking for them.



Oh and of course, today is friday so it's time for fun foods friday!

This weeks recipe meatloaf. Nothing too special, but it's really easy to make (well I think!)

Easy Meatloaf

1 tbsp evoo (extra virgin olive oil)
1/2 cup chopped onion
1 1/2 lbs ground beef
3/4 cups of oats
1/4 cup ketchup
1 tbsp worscheshire sauce
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 egg beaten
3 tbsp milk

Preheat oven to 375.
Chop onion and then sautee until tender - about 2-3 minutes.
In a medium size bowl mix meat, oats, egg, ketchup, worst. sauce salt and milk. Add in onion. Fold it all together and place in a greased loaf pan.
Cook at 375 for one hour.
When done, take out and let sit for 5 minutes.

I like to add in garlic and spices. Also, the other night instead of ketchup and wors. sauce, I did bbq sauce and it was yummy.

Enjoy!